Korean hatchbacks are what happens when women with zero interest in cars go shopping for new wheels. Hence The Blonde’s ride when I met her. To be fair to the thing, what it lacked in style (and quality and finish and refinement and longevity and class) it made up for in utilitarian practicality and reliability. A mode of transport, the “white goods” of the automotive world. A basic fridge keeps food cold and provides no other purpose. The Blondes Korean hatchback got her from point A to Point B and provided no other purpose.
Which is all fine and well until you come to sell the blighters. The Blonde had looked at the possibility of changing it a year or two ago and the part exchange offers almost turned her into The Grey. Not good.
So it was with a degree of trepidation that I helped her place an advert in the good old Autotrader. A couple of much newer models had appeared at not a huge amount more than we’d decided to ask, were we being hopelessly optimistic? Figuring we could always drop the price but we couldn’t raise it we clicked the button to place the advert and sat back to see what materialised.
Within a day she’d got a call, is the car still for sale? Fortunately I’d warned her about dodgy agents so their claim that they had a buyer waiting and all she had to do was pay them £80 which they’d refund upon sale (claiming they’d make the money from selling their buyer finance) fell on deaf ears. It’s the oldest scam in the car trade world and they must dupe thousands of innocent sellers with their empty promises and demands for cash to introduce mystery buyers who’d apparently found them but not The Autotrader and who equally mysteriously fade away as soon as the “finders fee” is handed over. Why don’t Trading Standards act against these rogues? I suggested she keep their number and, when the next dodgy agent phoned with similarly bogus claims, tell the second caller that they need to speak to “her husband” and pass on the phone number of the first one.
Then a few days later another call, seemingly genuine this time although slightly odd in that the buyer told her that a temporary injury stopped him coming to see the car, would she take it to him? He gave his name and his company where he’d like to meet us, and even agreed to cover fuel if he didn’t buy it. Seemed slightly rum but The Blonde said he sounded genuine, his name and company checked out and tied together, it was hard to see how it could be a scam. (It has happened the other way around whereby buyers are duped into viewing a bogus car that is apparently an urgent sale bargain. Cash is required and when the buyer arrives they’re mugged for it, quite violently in a recent case that’s just seen a man jailed for it). So figuring we had nothing to lose we went for it together, her in The Korean Thing, me following in my company car.
Half hour or so later we arrived about midday at the chaps premises and asked for him. Sure enough he turned up on crutches and turned out to be a lovely genuinely nice guy. He’d been given a lift in a similar car and found it very comfortable even despite his injuries (of which were well on the mend he assured us) hence had decided to look for one for himself. We showed him around the car, The Blondes carefully filed full service history, offered him a ride up the road (declined) and then adjourned to talk money.
His offer was some way short of the asking price, but mindful of our somewhat optimistic figure and complete lack of any other interest I quietly reminded The Blonde of the old “bird in the hand” proverb and we shook on it.
Twenty minutes later, paperwork completed and a manila envelope stuffed with cash, we were heading home. Job done at a very fair price for him, but which was nearly two and a half times what she’d been offered by the dealers a year earlier!
All that remained was to swap her insurance, collect The Polite Hatchback, and she became the proud owner of a proper car, one with style, class, image, great residuals, superb handling, a peppy motor and a cracking chassis.
Just like The Blonde herself in fact!
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